Franglais;

Have you ever gotten the feeling in the pit of your stomach like you know you shouldn't be doing something, but you do it anyway? It's like this one incident has the potential to fuck up everything you've ever wanted, but you just cast all the bad things aside to live in the moment. And then at the most inconvenient times it comes back to haunt you & just hangs in your mind. Yeahh it's an awful feeling, and I've been getting it a lot lately. But no matter how many times I suffer through the aftershock, I always tell myself that, "things will be different this time." They never are. It's always the same. Usually the same situation, perpetually the same consequences. I just can't control myself. With this situation, I don't think with my mind. I think with my heart & my desires at the moment. And most of the time those desires fuck me over. Wow, I've used 'fuck' twice already. That's how you know it's bad.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I mean, I want to stop things, and I tell myself that I will when the opportunity arises, but when it does I don't do anything. I just sit there & accept that it's happening. Il y a deux hommes. Les deux sont tress gentil. Maiss, un est un peu d'un douchebag quelquefoiis. L'autre est tres timide et ne parle pas a moi beaucoup. Mais j'aime (pas commee adore, AIME) les deux. I don't even know why I like one of them. He's mean, and most of the time he's just an idiot. Mais il y a les temps quand il est symmpa et juste...mignon. But the other one, il est mignonn tout les temps. La probleme avec lui est que je ne sais pas s'il m'aime. Et je ne le connais pas beaucoup. But I can always get to know him. Its just that l'autre garcon est un probleme avec lui. Il faut que je fini les choses avec le garcon mechant. Mais je ne sais pas comment le faire. C'est tres difficile pour moi parce que jnsp quoi dire. Ou comment. Ou quand. Alors, j'ai de pensant pour faire:/
In a perfect world, one would stop liking me & forget all about me, and the other would just get to know me better & something might happen from there. But when is the world ever truly perfect?

superstars of the day:
Chelsea Mariko
Michael Perryman
Maxwell Oglevee
Madame Schmitz<3 je t'aime, et je suis tres desolee de ton pere:(