I want your loving & I want your revenge;

Laying in bed late at night, I think about everything. School, friends, family, future and past relationships. Everything. And as of lately I haven't been too happy with the outcome. Sure, I've had some good times with my friends, but nothing compares to having that one special person to think about right before I fall asleep. You know what I'm talking about. The person you just can't seem to get out of your head. The person that you include in all your romantic fantasies. The person you just wish would feel the same way about you.
In the past, I've had many of these people. But now, it's like I can't seem to hold on. I keep pushing away, making myself think that I don't want anything to do with them, then when I finally realize that I need them in my life, it's just too late. I can't go back, and they feel a different way about me than before.
Is it too much to ask for a good old-fashioned romance? I thought I had it once with a guy I met a lonng time ago, but I somehow managed to fuck that up too. He told me he was in love with me, and that he always would be. But I guess that's not how things work anymore.

Going to Bonjour Cafe. Need to clear my head.